Hello Quirks,
It feels good to be in NYC. I just moved out here from California. I grew up in Loomis, CA, a small town where cow chip bingo was a large share of fundraising for our high school athletics teams. For those of you who are international Quirks, I begrudgingly fit some of the California stereotypes. I lived on the beach for some time where I learned to play only terribly “chill” acoustic guitar riffs, surfed, and ate burritos which are now my go-to comfort food. I use the terms “bro” (pronounced breh), “dude,” “hella,” and “tight” with a sense of irony, yet they’ve snuck their way into most conversations unknowingly. I have yet to decide whether I will make efforts to drop my CA dialect while heading up international distribution at Quirky, considering Google Translate will probably not properly translate “dude, that’s hella tight” into various languages.
Moving to New York from San Francisco, I was forced to abandon an array of prized possessions including a Flying V electric guitar, cherished shoes, a gaggle (1) of wooden quail figurines, a quiver of surfboards, and most painfully (literally), a 1960′s Hammond organ I bought for $15 and destroyed my back moving (2). Now that I’ve made the move I will replace those possessions with hobbies that require smaller junk. I have thoughts of cobbling at least one leather shoe, hopefully a pair. I am going to run as many miles as I can in Central Park before winter and I would love to surf at least once a month, even though I am in Manhattan.
Like many sales guys, I don’t consider myself a traditional sales guy, but I am likely the only person at Quirky fond of Microsoft Excel. “I mean, how else do you pivot a table?” (Note from Jess: Groan…) Unlike many sales guys, I love to read.
I am excited to publish blog posts about setting up international distribution. From my experience, researching distributors is not a web-friendly or transparent endeavor, and we at Quirky plan to do what we can to change that. It will be awesome to figure out how to leverage Quirks around the world to create stronger relationships and distribution channels. I can’t wait to make you guys some $$$!
Love,
Garret Van der Boom
Fun Facts:
1. I am allergic to the most pansy allergens including but not limited to pansies e.g. bunnies and kittens.
2. I will eat buffalo flavored anything at any time.
3. I most likely have Seasonal Affective Disorder (SAD) so I can’t wait for my first real winter.
Footnotes:
(1) I could not find the correct venery for quail figurines but thanks to my research I will now use the proper phrase “a coffle of donkey/ass.”
(2) The organ weighed 166 pounds, 40 pounds more than the friend I suckered into helping me. In the initial move it was carried down 3 floors, up 3 floors. One month later the organ was moved down 3 floors, up 2 floors before departing for NYC. Chiropractic is included in our health benefits, so that is chill.
